Finally found a moment to play the extended demo, and it was so good! 🥺
The world-building is amazing and it just draws you in, I'm so impressed with how well it's all constructed and how the pieces fit neatly together. (I especially loved the shifts in James's aura when he absorbed the different heart pieces, that's such a clever detail)
The other highlight was definitely the characters and the relationships between them, I enjoyed the different dynamics they had going on. James was definitely my fave, he's such a sweetheart, I loved him very much. 🥺💕 He and Chris make a great duo. (though I find it intriguing that James seemed more human than Chris at times and there's still a lot we don't know about Chris so I'm very curious 🤔) (also, a special mention for Amelia, 'cause she was adorable 🤭)
Also, the art was adorable and expressive, you've got a great style. ^^
An amazing job overall. I wish it didn't end there, and I can't wait to see the rest of it. 👌
Aww thank you!! T__T I'm glad you like James so much; I had no idea whether people were still going to be receptive towards him after a certain part in the story, so it's refreshing to hear! I can't comment on some of this stuff, but I'm delighted you're thinking about it 8)
I hope you enjoy the full version; thanks again for reading! :')
OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! HI, I'M SO HAPPY THAT PART 2'S FINALLY OUT!!!! I REMEMBER COMING ACROSS THIS SERIES AND THE CHARACTERS AND PLOT BEING SO GOOD!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO PLAY IT AGAIN!!!
I really, really appreciate your enthusiasm , thank you. ;_;
Just letting you know there are some lag issues that I'm trying to work out of the browser version right now, so if you happen to read that one and it seems like it froze, just give it a bit to finish loading the scene!
HEY, I JUST GOT BACK FROM FINISHING UP ALL OF THE ENDINGS!!!! I've been kind of busy these past few days, but I finally got the time to replay it and gaaaaaahhhh ;--; I already loved the first chapter a bunch, and I'm amazed at how much I loved this version of it even more! I also loved seeing Chris grow increasingly attached to James over the course of the story (I did too and got very sad over the trajectory of one of the routes because I missed him too much lol) and I really loved seeing the change in Chris' attitiude - initially being very goal-driven and emotionally withdrawn from everyone, to making that decision to stand by James, even when he's emotionally deteriorating with stress Q^Q I really loved seeing that, and I really hope that James is able to get what he's searching for <33 Also, I made sure to try out all of the options to see that I was on the right track and I got the ending with the [ To Be Continued ] screen on my first try >:3 mwehehehehe!!!
Thank you for reading T__T This comment made me really, really happy. I think I reread it nearly a double-digit number of times as I was trying to type this ahaha
I'm glad Chris's shift in behavior left that sort of impression on you! It feels odd to say "I'm happy James made you sad," but I'm happy that you cared, is what I'm trying to get at!!
It kind of sounds like you read things in a slightly odd order; I've been curious about how that affects the perception of the story, if you happen to have any other thoughts on that specifically (it's fine if you don't!)
Yoooo I streamed this today (At the time of writing) and had such a fun time!! The story had me hooked and trying to make my own theories on what would happen, and I can't wait for the full thing! Also James is my son now-
Thank you!!! T__T Your stream was so funny and nice, I stayed up late watching it and then when I woke up this morning I immediately rewound it and watched it again!
The way you voice acted Emily was my favorite, but I really liked the voices you picked for James & Lena too!! Your comments about James made me smile a lot; I'm really glad you liked him so much. :')
Since you asked in stream, I'll just mention here that I used TyranoBuilder to make this. It's very janky and I definitely wouldn't recommend it for large-scale projects. (But despite that, I still infinitely prefer using it over Renpy...haha.)
You've given me a very particular sort of joyful experience here that I doubt anyone will ever be able to replicate, so I hope this reply captures at least a fraction of my appreciation, thank you.
I keep forgetting to comment here because I've been busy, but I did play your game on launch day! I really enjoyed the little demo you put out. It was so nice to finally see your characters in their original world. The worldbuilding is amazing and it feels like something that should be adapted into a movie. I'm a huge sucker for stories like these.
I think someone said most of the critiques I had, so I won't repeat them. I do have one thing I'd like to point out that bothered me a little bit. I felt like Chris, as a protagonist, was really passive. Maybe it's because I'm more used to visual novels where you have agency in the events of the story, but seeing Chris just take the whole situation around him as mildly inconvenient baffled me. If I was in there, I would be freaking out and shaking James as I demanded he explain what was going on haha. Anyway, feel free to ignore this part of the comment if it's essential to Chris's character to be passive.
My favorite part of the visual novel was seeing Jack. He's always low-key been my favorite of the cast because I like emotionally-constipated characters. After playing the demo, I went to your toyhouse and read everyone's bios because I wanted to know more about the characters that didn't show up. It made me realize that everyone here is very young omg. I need to speak to Maestro right now because forcing all these teens to play in your orchestra definitely goes against child labor laws🤔Also, I'm really excited to meet Kade! I've always been interested in learning more about them because I like their style. Ahhh I think I'm just excited about your game in general, I can already tell the final product will be a banger!
The worldbuilding is amazing and it feels like something that should be adapted into a movie.
This comment in particular...feels very good...thank you....
If I was in there, I would be freaking out and shaking James as I demanded he explain what was going on haha.
In Chris's defense, he does basically do that, just short of physically grabbing him. I dunno if the time gap between reading the scene and commenting here impacted your impression, or if the visual limitations got in the way of communicating just how demanding and frantic he initially is in that moment. I'll think about it, either way!
Apart from that though, I wrote Chris like that 100% intentionally. I'm building towards some stuff; I promise he won't be like that forever! (Unless you're hoping for him to like, actually kick some ass. He's always going to be a wet noodle in that aspect.) I'd actually go as far as to say that James is the actual protagonist for the first 40% or so of the story...Chris just doesn't really have his shit together quite yet.
I'm glad you like Jack for those specific reasons...whenever people tell me they like him, I'm always lowkey worried they're actually falling for his mask. I think you probably WILL like Kade a lot, just from the general vibe I've gotten from your own characters ahaha...
I need to speak to Maestro right now because forcing all these teens to play in your orchestra definitely goes against child labor laws
((And they weren't even getting paid.))
Anyway, thanks for the comment!! And thanks for reading!!!
I enjoyed this a lot! It really drew me in. I will be thinking about this for a while. The characters are so adorable and their interactions with each other have a lot of heart. Extremely excited for the full game!
This is a really unique story! I finished the whole demo; I love your use of classical pieces as character leitmotifs, especially Le Tambourin for Jack (I played it at a piano recital when I was eleven, and it's been one of my favourite songs ever since, so hearing it in the game was a really fun surprise). All of the character art is really well done, too, and I was impressed in particular with the amount of detail you've put in for the backgrounds for the different locations throughout the theater. I think that my favourite character so far is Lena, and I'm curious to see where you'll take the story.
so hearing it in the game was a really fun surprise
Hehe I've had some similar experiences to this so it makes me happy knowing I could unintentionally bring that kind of joy to someone else.
I'm glad you like Lena!! :') I end up worrying about her getting drowned out by other characters that have a stronger presence in the story, so hearing this was really nice.
Thanks for reading and thank you for this very nice comment!
Just wanted to say too that I read through "Esther Has No Voice" and really enjoyed what you've got so far! Elfric was my personal favorite.
Thank you! I actually haven't had a lot of people I know play all the way through what I've written of the game so far, so I really appreciate the feedback!
Wooo just finished a playthrough or three of this and here's my early thoughts! I know there's lots to be added later, so just take these as very very initial impressions. ^^
This will be so immersive with sound effects! I can already imagine how spooky the full version might be—footsteps down the halls, impact noises when people get hit, whooshing of movement... even as a demo I was able to sort of "hear" and expect these beats in my head.
I would love some ambient noise as an alternative for background music during scenes where it's just Chris and James walking around. Even a low drone or something would be enough to draw me in.
This one is just a preference and idk how viable it is in different engines, but this would be great with dialogue blips. There are so many unique characters that I bet you can do a lot with this type of "voice."
(Below are my reactions during my first playthrough!)
These backgrounds are pretty and well-chosen to fit the vibe!
"I mean, that's a seven year old, what's she gonna do?" LOOOLLLLL
Chris is pretty headstrong! Really wasn't expecting that, he seems more reserved at a glance. It makes for interesting interactions. :P
LENA IS TERRIFYING
HOLY CRAP THIS STORY IS DARK AND VIOLENT??
JACK IS SCARY.
I like the speed up or pitch-up of the music when Jack gets angry! I am too tired to know which one it is right now but it made my heart rate go up LMAO
The fade-in of the stars was super cool!
I love the baton scene with James a lot.
Wow that is indeed one tall boi!
cute end card! <33
and shoutout to your uncle; he's a real one.
BUGS & SUGGESTIONS
Typo 1
"James *peaks out the door to make sure the coast is clear, then they both make a break for it."
*Peaks should be peeks.
Typo 2
"Two countries are trapped in a cold war with one another. It *effects every other country on the continent too, but as they are, they're all too weak to do anything about the two warring powerhouses."
*Effects should be affects.
Bug??
After having completed a playthrough, when I reach the Title Screen and hit "New Game," James' name has already replaced the '???' at the very beginning. After the scene switches during the first encounter with the Doll, then it goes back to ??? as it should be. Weirdly this only happens with James, and not Jack. Jack still gets his '????' intro. At first, I was kinda excited because I thought this was a built-in feature! I thought there was like, second-playthrough bonus content. Would be cool to have something carry over like that in the future. :P
All that said, I love the cast of characters so far and I hope to learn more about them as the game develops! Wonderful art style and such a cool concept!! :D
"I would love some ambient noise as an alternative for background music during scenes where it's just Chris and James walking around. Even a low drone or something would be enough to draw me in."
This is a great suggestion, thanks. I don't know why I never considered doing it haha. Dialogue blips are probably going to be a little too much for the engine I'm using, but I'll look into that too.
My brain can't tell the difference between effects/affects even when I google it ahaha, so thanks for pointing out the typos!!
"At first, I was kinda excited because I thought this was a built-in feature! I thought there was like, second-playthrough bonus content."
Yeah, this is a scripting error, sorry. :( I actually...had been considering second-playthrough content, but couldn't imagine anyone playing it that thoroughly, so thanks for proving my doubts wrong!
Thank you for the thorough comment!! I really enjoyed reading your reactions too! I hope you'll enjoy the full version. :')
Edit: Well... I can't wait to read everything, haha :'D I want to protect James, I didn't expected Chris to be so gutsy and I love it, and I love how we can feel all the attention and thinking you've put in this world and its characters. It also was really nice to read! And I love your choice of musics, and that there's not necessarily music ALL the time!
And as always, your art is so SO good ;U; Good luck with the rest!!! This is already so cool and interesting! *__*
(Oh, i've noticed a mistake here, there's two "the" and I guess it wasn't supposed to be like this? ) :
Ohhhhhhh man it's so nice to hear from you again!!! I'm glad you liked it, that means a lot! ;_;
Thanks for pointing out the typo, I was in the middle of patching a bug anyway so like...perfect timing hehe.
I noticed you followed my art blog on tumblr, I'm going to follow you back with my personal reblog blog...just letting you know that's me! :'D (You don't have to follow it back; I just didn't want it to come across like I was ignoring you ahaha)
Thanks for reading, this comment was super encouraging to receive!! T__T
Yeaah I'm not on PF anymore because it's too hard for me to manage more than two socials haha, but I'm so glad you've made a page here and on tumblr (which I still browse sometimes, so yay!!! :D )
Glad the typo was pointed out on time! >:3 I've re-read all your comics after playing the game and wow, really, I can't wait to see more! I love how in this few minutes of gameplay, we can already feel that there's more to each character than what we could think at the beginning. I want them all to be happy ;U; (tho I loved the dark atmosphere too, so well done!!! )
I just finished reading this!!! The art's so pretty, and I love the plot that the story has going for it so far. It's really interesting, and so are all of the characters as well, and I can't wait for more to be released!!! :">
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[slight spoilers below]
Finally found a moment to play the extended demo, and it was so good! 🥺
The world-building is amazing and it just draws you in, I'm so impressed with how well it's all constructed and how the pieces fit neatly together. (I especially loved the shifts in James's aura when he absorbed the different heart pieces, that's such a clever detail)
The other highlight was definitely the characters and the relationships between them, I enjoyed the different dynamics they had going on. James was definitely my fave, he's such a sweetheart, I loved him very much. 🥺💕 He and Chris make a great duo. (though I find it intriguing that James seemed more human than Chris at times and there's still a lot we don't know about Chris so I'm very curious 🤔) (also, a special mention for Amelia, 'cause she was adorable 🤭)
Also, the art was adorable and expressive, you've got a great style. ^^
An amazing job overall. I wish it didn't end there, and I can't wait to see the rest of it. 👌
Aww thank you!! T__T I'm glad you like James so much; I had no idea whether people were still going to be receptive towards him after a certain part in the story, so it's refreshing to hear! I can't comment on some of this stuff, but I'm delighted you're thinking about it 8)
I hope you enjoy the full version; thanks again for reading! :')
OH MY GOD!!!!!!!! HI, I'M SO HAPPY THAT PART 2'S FINALLY OUT!!!! I REMEMBER COMING ACROSS THIS SERIES AND THE CHARACTERS AND PLOT BEING SO GOOD!!! I CAN'T WAIT TO PLAY IT AGAIN!!!
I really, really appreciate your enthusiasm , thank you. ;_;
Just letting you know there are some lag issues that I'm trying to work out of the browser version right now, so if you happen to read that one and it seems like it froze, just give it a bit to finish loading the scene!
I hope you enjoy(ed??) reading it!!
HEY, I JUST GOT BACK FROM FINISHING UP ALL OF THE ENDINGS!!!! I've been kind of busy these past few days, but I finally got the time to replay it and gaaaaaahhhh ;--; I already loved the first chapter a bunch, and I'm amazed at how much I loved this version of it even more! I also loved seeing Chris grow increasingly attached to James over the course of the story (I did too and got very sad over the trajectory of one of the routes because I missed him too much lol) and I really loved seeing the change in Chris' attitiude - initially being very goal-driven and emotionally withdrawn from everyone, to making that decision to stand by James, even when he's emotionally deteriorating with stress Q^Q I really loved seeing that, and I really hope that James is able to get what he's searching for <33 Also, I made sure to try out all of the options to see that I was on the right track and I got the ending with the [ To Be Continued ] screen on my first try >:3 mwehehehehe!!!
I ended up accidentally clicking enter and posting this before actually finishing my comment, so I had to go back and edit it T--T
Thank you for reading T__T This comment made me really, really happy. I think I reread it nearly a double-digit number of times as I was trying to type this ahaha
I'm glad Chris's shift in behavior left that sort of impression on you! It feels odd to say "I'm happy James made you sad," but I'm happy that you cared, is what I'm trying to get at!!
It kind of sounds like you read things in a slightly odd order; I've been curious about how that affects the perception of the story, if you happen to have any other thoughts on that specifically (it's fine if you don't!)
Thanks again!!! ;-;
Yoooo I streamed this today (At the time of writing) and had such a fun time!! The story had me hooked and trying to make my own theories on what would happen, and I can't wait for the full thing! Also James is my son now-
Thank you!!! T__T Your stream was so funny and nice, I stayed up late watching it and then when I woke up this morning I immediately rewound it and watched it again!
The way you voice acted Emily was my favorite, but I really liked the voices you picked for James & Lena too!! Your comments about James made me smile a lot; I'm really glad you liked him so much. :')
Since you asked in stream, I'll just mention here that I used TyranoBuilder to make this. It's very janky and I definitely wouldn't recommend it for large-scale projects. (But despite that, I still infinitely prefer using it over Renpy...haha.)
You've given me a very particular sort of joyful experience here that I doubt anyone will ever be able to replicate, so I hope this reply captures at least a fraction of my appreciation, thank you.
I keep forgetting to comment here because I've been busy, but I did play your game on launch day! I really enjoyed the little demo you put out. It was so nice to finally see your characters in their original world. The worldbuilding is amazing and it feels like something that should be adapted into a movie. I'm a huge sucker for stories like these.
I think someone said most of the critiques I had, so I won't repeat them. I do have one thing I'd like to point out that bothered me a little bit. I felt like Chris, as a protagonist, was really passive. Maybe it's because I'm more used to visual novels where you have agency in the events of the story, but seeing Chris just take the whole situation around him as mildly inconvenient baffled me. If I was in there, I would be freaking out and shaking James as I demanded he explain what was going on haha. Anyway, feel free to ignore this part of the comment if it's essential to Chris's character to be passive.
My favorite part of the visual novel was seeing Jack. He's always low-key been my favorite of the cast because I like emotionally-constipated characters. After playing the demo, I went to your toyhouse and read everyone's bios because I wanted to know more about the characters that didn't show up. It made me realize that everyone here is very young omg. I need to speak to Maestro right now because forcing all these teens to play in your orchestra definitely goes against child labor laws🤔Also, I'm really excited to meet Kade! I've always been interested in learning more about them because I like their style. Ahhh I think I'm just excited about your game in general, I can already tell the final product will be a banger!
This comment in particular...feels very good...thank you....
In Chris's defense, he does basically do that, just short of physically grabbing him. I dunno if the time gap between reading the scene and commenting here impacted your impression, or if the visual limitations got in the way of communicating just how demanding and frantic he initially is in that moment. I'll think about it, either way!
Apart from that though, I wrote Chris like that 100% intentionally. I'm building towards some stuff; I promise he won't be like that forever! (Unless you're hoping for him to like, actually kick some ass. He's always going to be a wet noodle in that aspect.) I'd actually go as far as to say that James is the actual protagonist for the first 40% or so of the story...Chris just doesn't really have his shit together quite yet.
I'm glad you like Jack for those specific reasons...whenever people tell me they like him, I'm always lowkey worried they're actually falling for his mask. I think you probably WILL like Kade a lot, just from the general vibe I've gotten from your own characters ahaha...
((And they weren't even getting paid.))
Anyway, thanks for the comment!! And thanks for reading!!!
I enjoyed this a lot! It really drew me in. I will be thinking about this for a while. The characters are so adorable and their interactions with each other have a lot of heart. Extremely excited for the full game!
Thanks a bunch!! Really motivating to hear! ;_;
Hope you'll enjoy the rest
This is a really unique story! I finished the whole demo; I love your use of classical pieces as character leitmotifs, especially Le Tambourin for Jack (I played it at a piano recital when I was eleven, and it's been one of my favourite songs ever since, so hearing it in the game was a really fun surprise). All of the character art is really well done, too, and I was impressed in particular with the amount of detail you've put in for the backgrounds for the different locations throughout the theater. I think that my favourite character so far is Lena, and I'm curious to see where you'll take the story.
Hehe I've had some similar experiences to this so it makes me happy knowing I could unintentionally bring that kind of joy to someone else.
I'm glad you like Lena!! :') I end up worrying about her getting drowned out by other characters that have a stronger presence in the story, so hearing this was really nice.
Thanks for reading and thank you for this very nice comment!
Just wanted to say too that I read through "Esther Has No Voice" and really enjoyed what you've got so far! Elfric was my personal favorite.
Thank you! I actually haven't had a lot of people I know play all the way through what I've written of the game so far, so I really appreciate the feedback!
Wooo just finished a playthrough or three of this and here's my early thoughts! I know there's lots to be added later, so just take these as very very initial impressions. ^^
This will be so immersive with sound effects! I can already imagine how spooky the full version might be—footsteps down the halls, impact noises when people get hit, whooshing of movement... even as a demo I was able to sort of "hear" and expect these beats in my head.
I would love some ambient noise as an alternative for background music during scenes where it's just Chris and James walking around. Even a low drone or something would be enough to draw me in.
This one is just a preference and idk how viable it is in different engines, but this would be great with dialogue blips. There are so many unique characters that I bet you can do a lot with this type of "voice."
(Below are my reactions during my first playthrough!)
BUGS & SUGGESTIONS
Typo 1
Typo 2
Bug??
After having completed a playthrough, when I reach the Title Screen and hit "New Game," James' name has already replaced the '???' at the very beginning. After the scene switches during the first encounter with the Doll, then it goes back to ??? as it should be.
Weirdly this only happens with James, and not Jack. Jack still gets his '????' intro.
At first, I was kinda excited because I thought this was a built-in feature! I thought there was like, second-playthrough bonus content. Would be cool to have something carry over like that in the future. :P
All that said, I love the cast of characters so far and I hope to learn more about them as the game develops! Wonderful art style and such a cool concept!! :D
I hope there will be some music jokes tooThis is a great suggestion, thanks. I don't know why I never considered doing it haha. Dialogue blips are probably going to be a little too much for the engine I'm using, but I'll look into that too.
My brain can't tell the difference between effects/affects even when I google it ahaha, so thanks for pointing out the typos!!
Yeah, this is a scripting error, sorry. :( I actually...had been considering second-playthrough content, but couldn't imagine anyone playing it that thoroughly, so thanks for proving my doubts wrong!
Thank you for the thorough comment!! I really enjoyed reading your reactions too! I hope you'll enjoy the full version. :')
Thanks for reading!
!!!! OMG IT'S HERE!!! I'm so happy! ;O;
Edit: Well... I can't wait to read everything, haha :'D I want to protect James, I didn't expected Chris to be so gutsy and I love it, and I love how we can feel all the attention and thinking you've put in this world and its characters. It also was really nice to read! And I love your choice of musics, and that there's not necessarily music ALL the time!
And as always, your art is so SO good ;U; Good luck with the rest!!! This is already so cool and interesting! *__*
(Oh, i've noticed a mistake here, there's two "the" and I guess it wasn't supposed to be like this? ) :
Ohhhhhhh man it's so nice to hear from you again!!! I'm glad you liked it, that means a lot! ;_;
Thanks for pointing out the typo, I was in the middle of patching a bug anyway so like...perfect timing hehe.
I noticed you followed my art blog on tumblr, I'm going to follow you back with my personal reblog blog...just letting you know that's me! :'D (You don't have to follow it back; I just didn't want it to come across like I was ignoring you ahaha)
Thanks for reading, this comment was super encouraging to receive!! T__T
Yeaah I'm not on PF anymore because it's too hard for me to manage more than two socials haha, but I'm so glad you've made a page here and on tumblr (which I still browse sometimes, so yay!!! :D )
Glad the typo was pointed out on time! >:3 I've re-read all your comics after playing the game and wow, really, I can't wait to see more! I love how in this few minutes of gameplay, we can already feel that there's more to each character than what we could think at the beginning. I want them all to be happy ;U; (tho I loved the dark atmosphere too, so well done!!! )
I like both the art and the plot
Thank you! :')
I just finished reading this!!! The art's so pretty, and I love the plot that the story has going for it so far. It's really interesting, and so are all of the characters as well, and I can't wait for more to be released!!! :">
Ahh thanks a lot, I really appreciate it!! ;_; Hope you'll enjoy the rest in the future!
Of course :">